I'm going to be interviewed this morning for NPR's Morning Edition on the effectiveness of gas boycotts. The interview will be recorded at 4:30 AM and if I am coherent will make it to air on one of the business segments. Listen on your local NPR station for shameless plugs for Env-Econ.
Update: It's 5:10 AM and the interview is in the can as they say in the biz. Below is a running diary of my first--and probably last--foray into radio journalism.
Update 2: The interview aired. You can click here to compare my version of events (below) to the actual interview. I was a little off in my recollection. I don't sound like a complete idiot--just a partial one.
3:50 AM: I wake up. Not because the alarm wakes me up, but because I had a taco salad for lunch yesterday.
3:55 AM: I collect all of the phones in my house and take them to my office. I know the phone is going to ring at 4:30 and I'm trying not to wake up the kids. I make a pot of coffee.
4:00 AM: I sit down to do some background research on my interviewer and gas prices. I'm going to be prepared for a hard-hitting expert opinion on this boycott nonsense.
4:10 AM: Coffee's ready. I pour my first cup.
4:20 AM: I'm ready. I now have 3 pages of notes ready for the interview. When NPR called yesterday they told me the interview would last 15-20 minutes and then be edited down to 3. I'm fully confident I have enough material.
4:28 AM: Four phones ring simultaneously in my office. I nearly have a heart attack. Caller ID identifies the caller as National Public Radio. Here it is...my big break.
Caller: Mr. Hobb? [that's the way everyone pronounces my name. The correct pronunciation rhymes with cab, but I never correct it--the mistake is so common that I am fully convinced that I pronounce it wrong]
Me: Yes.
Caller: This is Allison [I think] from NPR. We are going to have to postpone your interview for a little while. There's breaking news in Egypt. We'll be back to you in about 15 minutes.
Me: Thank you.
4:35 AM: One cup of coffee down. I pour cup number two.
4:40 AM: What the hell am I doing up this early?
4:45 AM: I don't think this coffee is working.
4:50 AM: All four phone ring simultaneously, again scaring the [bleep] out of me.
Caller: Mr. Hobb?
Me: Yes.
Caller: I'm going to patch you through to production to get a sound level and then we'll put you through to Renee [Montagne, one of the hosts of Morning Edition]
Me: Thank you.
Production Dude: [faintly] Mr. Hobb?
Me: Yes
Production Dude: Tell me what the weather's like there.
Me: Ummmm...it's dark. [OK, I didn't really say that]. It's 45 degrees right now, but it's supposed to be a nice day today.
Production Dude: [more faintly] Mr Hobb?
Me: Yes.
Production Dude: [more faintly] Professor Hobb?
Me: Yes, I can hear you.
4: 53 AM: Call waiting beeps. It's National Public Radio on the other line. I flash over.
Me: Hello.
Caller: For some reason we couldn't hear you. I'm patching you through to production.
Me: Thank you.
Production Dude: Mr Hobb? Can you describe the weather for me.
Me: It's supposed to be sunny today.
Production Dude: How's the traffic there?
Me: Light? Compared to Washington DC it's nothing.
[I don't think I have the hang of this whole sound check thing]
Production Dude: OK, we need a little more. Can you count backwards from 10?
Me: 10,9,...
Production Dude: Hang on, I'm putting you on with Renee. Here she is.
4:55 AM: The interview starts. First there is a bunch of talk between Ms. Montagne and the production people. I have no idea what is going on or whether they even know I'm still on the line. Then Ms. Montagne asks me if my title is Professor or Associate Professor? I try to explain that most professors just go by professor regardless of rank...she doesn't seem interested, she wants to know which is more accurate...I say Associate Professor...she says 'thank you." Sheesh, are journalists really interested in accuracy?
The Interview (completely inaccurate based on my own faulty recollection):
Ms. Montagne reads an intro that mentions the blog...woohoo...then talks about the gas boycott e-mail chain letter.
First Question: Ok, so will a gas boycott force Exxon to reduce gas prices?
Me: Well, I have two answers to that and both are no, but for different reasons. My first reason is that the boycott will never hold up. We simply don't have the social coordination to maintain a boycott of that magnitude. Drivers are very responsive to small differences in prices between gas stations so as soon as one station lowers their price by as little as 5 cents, the boycott will break down. Imagine...
[Man I wish this coffee would work faster]
Ms. Montagne: OK, but that's really not the question and your babbling and that's completely uninteresting [alright she didn't really say that, it's just the impression that I got] OK, but suppose a boycott could be maintained. Would Exxon have to lower it's price?
Me: Well, no. Exxon has a 10-15% market share. A boycott would mean a 10-15% increase in demand at other stations, which would cause them to raise their prices. As soon as that happens, drivers would go back to Exxon.
[I'm completely confident that my answer was nowhere near that clear]
Ms. Montagne: I'm not following your logic. [Always an encouraging sign in an interview] Wouldn't Exxon have to lower their prices?
Me: Imaging a four corner gas station (I really said that)...I mean Imagine an intersection with gas stations on all four corners. If three of those stations raised their price by a couple of cents, what would happen? Everyone would go to the cheaper station. That's what would happen if there were a boycott.
Ms. Montagne: So you're saying the boycott would break down?
Me: Yes.
Ms. Montagne: OK, I'm getting the time's up signal [also known as the the 'this is a complete waste of our time' signal]. One last question, if a boycott won't work to lower prices is there anything the public can do to bring down gas prices:
[AHA, here it comes, my moment of redemption, my moment of glory]
Me: DRIVE LESS!
Ms. Montagne: OK, then. Thanks.
4:58 AM: I'm still on the line. I can here production stuff going on and chatter between Ms. Montagne and other people. I have no idea whether I'm supposed to just hang up, or talk to someone or what.
5:01 AM: I'm still on the line. I've now been on the line listening to other stuff longer than the interview itself.
5:02 AM: I hang up.
So there you have it. 20 years of schooling, 10 years of teaching, 3 pages of meticulous notes (which I never looked at) and my first national radio interview is going to consist of some incoherent rambling and me overenthusiastically yelling "DRIVE LESS."
Thank God for tenure. I'm going back to bed.
6:10 AM: Coffee's working.