As was foretold in prophecy Friday, Mark has shrugged off a sucker-punch to the face and responded with fisticuffs of his own, somehow managing to wind up and knock Marlin down with a right hook despite literally being an inch and a half away from him. Still, this victory is bittersweet, as Mark looks poignantly at the avalanche of sea turtle eggs cascading comically out of Marlin’s green poachin’-sack. Yes, there’s an exclamation point at the end of his dialogue, but based on his stricken facial expression I would guess that this is as close as we’ve ever come to seeing Mark on the verge of tears, bereft over the senseless loss of endangered animal life.
By the way, is sea turtle egg-poaching an actual thing? Like, could those eggs ever hatch now that they’ve been removed from their nest and plopped in a big pile in a bag? Do people try to keep sea turtles as pets? Do people eat sea-turtle eggs? Have we been reading the wrong meaning of “poaching” in this storyline all along?
Mark Trail even thinks to himself with exclamation points!
In “Between Two Ferns,” an off-color online parody of celebrity interview shows, the comedian Zach Galifianakis has spanked Justin Bieber with his belt, discussed Charlize Theron’s thighs and asked Natalie Portman for her phone number.
On Tuesday, Mr. Galifianakis welcomed President Obama to the comedy show that he has turned into an Internet cult favorite by making his guests feel awkward and uncomfortable.
The interview with the president, which was recorded two weeks ago, debuted online early Tuesday. The show’s creators at the website, Funny or Die, had kept its contents secret until then. White House aides who have seen the six-and-a-half-minute conversation with Mr. Obama say it is in keeping with the show’s spirit.
The main problem, as usual but no one wants to talk about it, is rising population:
Scientists at the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration sounded a strong warning about rising seas Monday, saying that ocean levels around the world are projected to increase by 12 inches or more should a bunch of people go swimming at the same time. “According to our latest analysis, an increase in global mean sea level of several inches is inevitable at this point given the approach of summer beach season, when millions of people will simultaneously go for a swim,” said oceanographer Paul Acosta at a press conference, adding that the increase could be “significantly higher” than currently predicted if lots of beachgoers choose to hold their breath and go under all the way. “Coastal cities and low-lying islands are the most vulnerable to rising sea levels, particularly if it’s not just kids who go for a dip, but full-grown adults as well. Our best hope now is moderating the rise as much as we can by convincing people to only wade in up to their waists.” Acosta also warned about the devastating possibilities of catastrophic tsunamis should everyone jump into the ocean together from a dock or off the side of a boat.
The central and eastern parts of the United States are currently suffering through one of the coldest winters on record, with the so-called polar vortex returning yet again this week to the Midwest and Northeast. Here are The Onion’s answers to readers’ most common questions about this year’s unusual and bitterly cold winter:
Does the inclement weather have anything to do with global warming?
No one’s looked into it yet.
How many people totally ate it while walking on a slick sidewalk this winter?
Only you, and everyone saw.
This harsh winter has been caused by the North Enchanter holding dominion over the winds of the ether plane. So to defeat him, we just need to summon a hearth witch, right?
Who are you?
I am Professor Snowflake.
What is the best way to deal with this world’s cold?
You just have to keep carrying the flame inside you. No matter how hard it gets to be, you carry that goddamn fire. It’s a hard world. Life is hard. But no matter what, you carry that fire, and you don’t let go.
These are only my favorites. You should read the whole thing.
I appreciate informal writing styles as a means of increasing accessibility. However, the informality here seems to decrease accessibility – partly because of the assumed knowledge of the reader for concepts and terms, and also for its wandering style. Many concepts are introduced without explanation and are not clearly and decisively linked in developing a narrative argument. I think the prose and argumentation would be much stronger if ideas were introduced and developed more deliberately and not assuming insider knowledge of the reader.
Good point. I have an informal writing style and that often works well, even for technical papers. But sometimes an informal paper is harder to follow for readers without the background knowledge. Paradoxically, a more stilted style with lots of notation and many stops to make precise definitions, can be more readable for the less-than-expert audience.
This email went out on the university listserv today (we're very excited):
Date: Monday, March 3, 2014 Time: 7:00 – 8:00 pm Location: Raley Hall -- Room 1020 Admission: Free, open to the public
Yoram Bauman is an environmental economist and a carbon tax Fellow at Sightline Institute. He performs regularly at colleges and corporate events, sharing the stage with everyone from Robin Williams to Paul Krugman. He has appeared in TIME Magazine and on PBS and NPR, and is the co-author of the forthcoming Cartoon Introduction to Climate Change and the two-volume Cartoon Introduction to Economics, which is now available in Chinese, German, Italian, etc. Speaking of foreign languages, he is also the organizer of the humor session at the annual meeting of the American Economic Association. He has a PhD in economics from the University of Washington and works in Washington State and elsewhere on climate change economics and policy, especially carbon pricing.
This show is sponsored by the Economics Club, Department of Economics, Center for Economic Research and Policy Analysis, Walker College of Business, Research Institute for Environment, Energy and Economics and Sustain Appalachian. Please contact John Whitehead (email@example.com) for more information.
Shortly after learning he had been granted tenure Tuesday, Northwestern University mathematics professor Hugh Botkin told reporters that the promotion has motivated him to work harder than ever before in his chosen field. “I was able to get this far in my career by publishing as many papers as possible and carefully negotiating departmental politics, but now the real work begins,” said Botkin, 43, whose tenured faculty position ensures his employment until he voluntarily exits the job or dies. “I’m going to start teaching a lot more classes, advise as many Ph.D. candidates as possible, and voluntarily extend my office hours so I can provide students with as much one-on-one time as they need. Tenure is a huge honor, but it also comes with a lot of responsibility. From now on, anyone who enrolls in one of my classes can be certain my top priority will be how I can best serve them as a professor.” Sources later confirmed Botkin was up half the night poring over teacher evaluations from his students and thinking about ways he could improve his lecturing style.
"This blog aims to look at more of the microeconomic ideas that can be used toward environmental ends. Bringing to bear a large quantity of external sources and articles, this blog presents a clear vision of what economic environmentalism can be."
... the Environmental Economics blog ... is now the default homepage on my browser (but then again, I guess I am a wonk -- a word I learned on the E.E. blog). That is a very nice service to the profession. -- Anonymous
"... I try and read the blog everyday and have pointed it out to other faculty who have their students read it for class. It is truly one of the best things in the blogosphere." -- Anonymous